I Do Not ♥ Trolls

I have been running a dozen Craigslist ads in cities within a 200 mile radius of the Indianapolis University Hospital Transplant Center since January, 2018. I have "met" scores of lovely, generous people via phone, text and email who want to help me . So far, none have been the right match.

I just renewed my ads again after letting them all expire.

I hate to admit it, but I was exhausted.

I knew there would be people wanting money. I knew the illegality of organ selling would not deter everyone.  

"Good morning. I will sell you my kidney for a beautiful 3 bedroom Cape Cod home and Worthington Ohio. I have two teenage children and we need a home! I have Medicaid. Very healthy." (Deedee M.)

Dear Deedee:  Breaking federal law notwithstanding, I cannot afford to buy you a beautiful 3 bedroom Cape Cod home and I don't think Worthington, Ohio is still for sale.

I knew there would be people from foreign countries searching for a way to come to the US. This usually involved money or just help with papers.

I did not know there would be trolls.

Fairy tale trolls live under bridges and terrorize Billy goats and small children. 

Internet trolls try to terrorize strangers. They do not have enough to do. Their psychosis is insecurity and they believe they are hysterically funny. Troll behavior probably makes them feel better about their miserable little selves. It probably does not help the halitosis. The joke is on them.

I do not care why they are the way they are.

I offer a small sampling of trollmail:

"can  i  have  you  for  my  life  mate"  (Bradley N.) 

Sure, Brad. 'Need a kidney donor' is code for 'my life's goal is to marry a stranger.

'"if i could do that for you could we be fwbs micheal here"  (Micheal S.)

You are a genius, Micheal! How did you know 'Need a kidney donor' is code for 'I want to have sex with a stranger?'  Sorry you have to go through life with a misspelled first name.

"Wrong area code. Not even from this state"  (Rex C.)

Your nickname is Sherlock, right? OMG! You caught me! There is no way I could have kept my Missouri cellphone number when I moved to Indiana. At least I don't have to go through life with a dog's name.

"just die your old and ready to go don`t put someone through all the pain just for you fucking people just die"  (Frank J.)

Frankie, Dear: Your apparent punctuation phobia, confusion about contractions and placing  the singular and plural in the same run-on sentence fragment is adorable. Telling me to die is precious. Back at ya.

I feel much better now. Trolling IS entertaining!  

Of course I never sent any of these replies, but I like pretending that I did.

Cheers!

♥

My Kidney Donor Campaign Marches Ever Onward

Phase I of my campaign to find a kidney donor is Facebook. 

facebook.com/maryannhopeneedsakidneydonor. Sharing my page and story CONTINUES to help me. Thank you for sharing - please don't stop!

Phase II is blanketing the state with flyers, buttons, bookmarks and bumper stickers.

I am so grateful to my Bloomington friends and family who have posted flyers and shared thingies!

)

Thanks to my flamenco, belly dance and yoga sisters for finding all kinds of different ways to help. 

Thanks to my barn mates at Ellington Stables (We have a blast playing with our ponies!)

And thanks to my Red Hats Purple Chaps sisters for posting flyers and giving out thingies all over Indiana. (RHPC is an over 50's women's equine group. We have a blast playing with our ponies!) 

I feel as though there are elves all over Indiana putting the word out on my behalf.

PHRASE III is using Craigslist and newspaper want ads.  

Craigslist ads are now appearing in the twelve largest cities within a 200 mile radius of Indianapolis (St. Louis and Chicago included). I have my first newspaper ad in the Bloomington/Bedford papers.

Phase IV is yet to come!  I will keep you posted!

Thank you for your help!

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Want some MAHNaKD Kits?

Thank you so much for helping me find a kidney donor!

I have been putting together MaryAnnHopeNeedsAKidneyDonor kits.  

Each kit contains:

• A flyer with info cards
• Bookmarks
• Buttons
• Car stickers

The items in the kits are for posting, wearing, sticking and giving away!

Not every one is comfortable doing this, 

so pass your kit on to someone else if you are unable to use it.

Thank you for helping me!

Thanks to YOU, I will find a kidney donor!

PS: If you need a kit or more items, 

email me at esperanza12100@gmail.com 

or message me on Facebook.

Stickers and Buttons and Stickers Oh My!

Thanks to my BFF Bette Lucas and White Rabbit Printing in Bloomington, I now have small 9" by 2" bumper stickers and buttons. 

(Photos not to scale!)

The price?

Nada. Zilch. Nought. Zero. Nothing.

After following this blog or following, liking and sharing my Facebook page. (www.facebook.com/maryannhopeneedsakidneydonor), all I need from you is a message or comment. 

Just let me know how many small bumper stickers, flyers, bookmarks, info cards with or without cute origami holders and buttons you feel you can use.

Give things away, then ask for more!
Remember to tell me your mailing address!

I always have a button on my hat or purse so I can give them away.

Thank you so much!  I am so grateful for your help!

I Need Your Help Posting, Sharing and Placing

I need help getting the word out that I need a kidney donor! In case you haven't heard, my kidneys are finally losing our half-decade+ battle with lupus. To read my story, see the blog post of 10-07-17, "Why I Need a Transplant - My Kidneys are Wimps."

My friend Bette Lucas has designed some sparky, spunky items to help get the word out. White Rabbit Printing in Bloomington, Indiana is printing everything for me.

Bumper stickers and buttons will be ready next week.

For now there are flyers loaded with info cards, (pushpins included.)

bookmarks

                                     and info cards 

                                                    with origami holders

Please follow this blog (upper right) or share my page at www.facebook.com/maryannhopeneedsakidneydonor 

Then comment here or IM me on Facebook to let me know your address and how many of each item you can post, place or give away.

• Flyers with info cards
• Packet of 20 Info cards
• Info cards with holders
• Bookmarks

I appreciate anything you can do to help!

Coming Next Week! A Contest You Are Guaranteed to Win!

The big contest begins next week!

Your chances for winning this bumper sticker are one in one!

Your chances for winning buttons, book marks, 

flyers and info cards are also one in one!

How do you enter this fabulous contest? Simply go to www.facebook.com/maryannhopeneedsakidneydonor and RESHARE my page. Then message me how many of each item you want along with your mailing address.

OR

FOLLOW this blog, maryannhopeneedsakidneydonor.blogspot.com 

Then use 'comments' at the bottom of this post to let me know 

how many of each item you want along with your mailing address. 

I really need to get the word out that I am looking for a kidney donor.  I am going to plaster my car with bumper stickers, but I certainly do not expect that from anyone else!

• Flyers loaded with information cards can be posted on community, church or teacher's lounge bulletin boards.
• Bumper stickers can go on your car bumper, trunk, back window or your horse trailer.  
• Put a little stack of book marks in your public library. 
• Display a stack of info cards in an origami card holder in your business, your favorite restaurant or on your desk at work. 
• Buttons are great on purses, hats, jackets, coats, dance bags or anything made of fabric. 
• Get things for your friends so they can also participate! 

                Buttons

Bookmarks

                                                Flyers loaded with two-sided information cards

  Info Cards in a handmade origami holder

    

RESHARE facebook.com/maryannhopeneedsakidneydonor

or

FOLLOW this blog

then

message me or write in 'comments':

how many of each item 

along with your mailing address

SO EASY!

THANK YOU!

All of these fabulous items were designed by Bette Lucas 

and are being printed by White Rabbit Printing in Bloomington, IN

They will be ready next week.

Size Doesn't Matter. Just Act Your Age

Because I am pre-transplant, I was on the Transplant Floor when I was in University Hospital in Indy getting rid of the Alien Baby. One day I was so happy to meet Dr. Goggins, head of the Kidney Transplant Team.  (He may have been referred to as Dr. Surgeon in the Alien Baby post.)

He said, "You are a lucky woman!  You will be able to receive a kidney a lot of other people will not be able to."

"WHAT?"

Dr. G told me that because I am a small person, I can receive a small, medium or large kidney.  A small kidney can do the work I need.

If I were a large person, I would need a large kidney.  A small one could not do the work a large person needs. So I can have a great big man kidney or a small woman kidney. In my case, size doesn't matter. Lucky!

I am seventy.  The average life expectancy for a female in the USA is about seventy-nine.    

A living donor kidney functions, on average, twelve to twenty years. The lower the number of functioning years basically equals an older donor. I do not need or want a kidney from a young person that will last for decades. Do the math.

The bottom line is, an older healthy person can absolutely donate their small, medium or large kidney.

Of course the selection process is a bit more complicated,  I just don't want anyone to think that just because they are a little long in the tooth (horse talk), they are automatically eliminated as a donor.

For more information about giving the Gift of Life, contact my exceptional team at IU Health Transplant Center at University Hospital in Indianapolis:  800 382 4602 or 317 944 4370  or online at www.iuhealth.org/transplant.  Please mention my name, Mary Ann Hope.

And please follow, like and share my Facebook 

page: facebook.com/MaryAnnHopeNeedsAKidneyDonor

There is a 'Follow' button on the upper right side of this page to follow my blog.

Thanks!
Mary Ann